Kizmeet Missed Connections
bars, clubs & dining gyms markets & shopping coffee shops concerts & stadiums outdoors on the move college campus miscellaneous
mouthing off
 
Mouthing Off homepage





  Search by keyword(s)
 










How do you pick up men?
After reading the discussion boards, everyone got me thinking...How should we women pick up men? Thing is, I am not afraid of rejection, I am just shy when it comes to making the first move. Aside from "hello," what are good ways to initiate a conversation with the male species at, for instance, a bar?
 
hopeful June 18, 2007 11:15PM

25 comments
Just approaching a guy at a bar and saying "hi" or "how's your night going?" is usually enough to let him know you may potentially be interested. If he's interested in you, it should be fairly obvious. And unless the guy is a total ass, he won't be demoralzing if he rejects you, since most guys appreciate it when we're hit on.

As for initiating conversation, if you don't want to lead with an awkward "How ya doin'?", one tactic is to make a comment about someone else in the place, so you can both people-watch together. Something like, "So what do you think the story is with those two over there?" Keeps it casual, creates an instant us vs. them bond, and less of an interview and 20 questions about each other's lives.

Back to work for me.

Trev June 19, 2007 12:23PM
 
Man, I can wait to go out Thursday night and try that!

dreamsincolor June 19, 2007 03:17PM
 
I can't tell if you're mocking me (no problem if you are, it happens regularly), but that approach can't hurt.

Trev June 20, 2007 09:17AM
 
Haha aww no I'm not. I'm sorry that it came across like that. But, you replied to me not being much of an approacher and told me why I might not be approached and then you gave us an easy way of doing it. It's a good idea, easy enough, so I actually can't wait to try it. So no, I wasn't mocking you haha. Sorry. And thanks for the tip.

dreamsincolor June 20, 2007 10:55AM
 
No worries. I'm just a little sensitive these days, I guess. Good luck with it.

Trev June 21, 2007 10:11AM
Thanks! I'll try that next time I'm out...Much appreciated!

hopeful June 19, 2007 05:50PM
 
My pleasure. Good luck to you too.

Trev June 25, 2007 10:07PM
Hey Trev.... where are you from? You seem like a very intelligent and sweet guy from the posts I've read.

Valkyrie June 27, 2007 05:41PM
 
Thanks, V. Nice of you to say. I just shoot from the hip on this thing. I'm from the outskirts of Chicago. How about you?

Trev June 29, 2007 07:47AM
I'm from San Diego. I just moved here a few months ago, and I'm not quite sure how to meet people, so the post about how to pick up men caught my eye. I tend to be one of the girls who has no idea what to say after "Hi, what's your name?", so I usually wait for them to approach me. I like your suggestions, though. :)

Valkyrie July 01, 2007 04:07PM
 
Good luck with it, and let me know how it goes. Where'd you move from?

Trev July 03, 2007 08:46AM
 
I moved here from Idaho. Biiiiiig difference. :) But I like it so far. Have you lived in Chicago all your life? I'll definitely let you know how it goes (fingers crossed.... and toes.... and eyes...). :D

Valkyrie July 03, 2007 05:29PM
Born and raised Chicago kid. I can only imagine that the Idaho to San Diego transition is a huge change. Fingers crossed for you too.

Trev July 05, 2007 08:17AM
 
It's definitely been a big transition for me. Fortunately, I have family here, so that's made it easier.
Seeing as it's much easier for me to talk to guys when I'm writing than it is for me to talk to them in person, I have enough nerve currently to let you know that I wish we were closer so I could meet you. I guess I'm intrigued. :)

Valkyrie July 05, 2007 04:48PM
Thanks, V. Definitely likewise.

Trev July 11, 2007 10:33AM
 
Would it be too forward to ask you for your email?

Valkyrie July 16, 2007 05:03PM
Hi V, Sorry I haven't checked this board in a couple days. It's definitely not to forward to ask for my email, and you seem very cool! But the thing is I've just starting seeing someone (we'd gone out a while ago and then got back in touch this past weekend), so I'm not sure it'd be right to start emailing. I know that may sound a bit prude. But for now, I think I may have to limit myself to just posting "advice" on this board.

How are things in SD? Any fun stuff planned for the weekend?

Trev July 20, 2007 08:43AM
 
More guys should be this honest and upfront! So many of them go running around on their gf to leave us upset and hating guys in the end...maybe that is another reason why woman dont approach guys...they could be taken and you would never know cause a lot of guys wont say.

ShrtSandra83 October 05, 2007 06:01PM
Hi Trev,

That doesn't sound prude at all. It makes perfect sense to me. Good luck. :)

Things are good here, though I've recently decided (again) that men suck.... Ok, not all of them, but it seems like the ones who do are good at finding me. But I'm not going to complain about that too much on here. :)

I didn't make any weekend plans because I had to work today, so it's been pretty boring for me. I hope your weekend was better than mine. :)

Valkyrie July 22, 2007 04:13PM
 
Sucks you had to work on a Sunday. Fun weekend for me... but need to sleep. Way past my bedtime.

Trev July 23, 2007 12:36AM
Hey Trev,

I guess we will not be writing our book on signals anymore since u have a lady now......

I think a lot of men on this site still need it though....

Computer Guy July 22, 2007 11:12PM
 
With my track record for screwing things up, I'm sure it's just a matter of time before I'm single again. I think the book of signals still needs to be written...


Trev July 23, 2007 12:35AM
You gotta think positive, Trev. :) And the book is definitely a good idea. Now to just get people to read it....

Valkyrie July 23, 2007 04:24PM
So Valkyrie,

Does that mean u will read the book if we write it?

Computer Guy July 23, 2007 10:52PM
 
Definitely. Besides that fact that I'll read just about anything and everything, I would love to read something that might give me a little more knowledge and insight than I had before.

Valkyrie July 27, 2007 09:13AM




AddThis Social Bookmark Button
 © 2006 Kizmeet, Inc.  · About Kizmeet  ·  How it Works  ·  Contact Us  ·  Testimonials  ·  Press  ·  FAQ  ·  Tell a Friend  ·  Online Dating Safety Tips  ·  Terms of Use  ·  Privacy  ·  Kizmeet Store  ·  Site Map  ·